Shanghai Surprises: A Traditional Chinese Wedding

I mentioned in the last post that we were fortunate enough to be able to attend our friend Melissa's wedding in Hong Kong. This was the first traditional Chinese wedding we had been to and I was really excited to see how it differed from our western weddings. The day starts for the bride very early and begins with the traditional red Chinese gown. Melissa's gown was all hand embroidered and she looked absolutely gorgeous. The groom comes to her family home in the morning (since Melissa lives in Shanghai, this was done at the hotel room) where he is greeted by the bridesmaids who basically tease him for at least 30 minutes before letting him in the door. Then there is all kinds of exchanges between the brides family and the groom. There are traditional foods to be eaten and of course a traditional tea ceremony. I was able to come up to the room and see the last part of the ceremony (I missed the first part because of the Disneyland hangover- we all over slept)! Throughout the day, the bride is given jewelry from her parents and relatives (look closely at the pics to see the gold bracelets). The morning portion of the ceremony takes about 2 hours. Then everyone packs up and moves to the grooms house. Not sure what goes on there though. At about 6:00pm the actual ceremony takes place. The guests arrive and are assigned a table but there is no gift table and I didn't see anywhere to deposit a red envelope (traditional way to give money) although I am sure that each guest did bring an envelope for them. The bride wears a traditional western wedding gown, her dad walks her in and the bride and groom get up on the stage and do the ring exchange. In Hong Kong, this is presided over by a lawyer (and the ceremony was in english but I think that was only b/c it took place in Hong Kong; otherwise, I am assuming it would have been in the local language). Then there are loads of family pictures to be taken. In the meantime, the guests were free to mingle and play majong- they even had a whole separate room set up with majong tables!

Then the meal began. We were seated with the only other two Caucasians in the room- go figure.

It was a 12 course meal served by an army of waiters who would march in exactly at the same time each time a new course was served. No worries if your table was in the back as we all got our food at the same time. During this time the bride had her first dress change. She had a separate changing room adjacent to the ballroom specifically for this purpose. Also, the mother of the bride changed her dress as well. This went on throughout the night- all together, Melissa had at least 6 dress changes! It was really fun to see what she would wear next.

There was no dancing, DJ, or band like we have in the US although there was an MC who made all the announcements. Also, there was one game that we called "Embarrass the foreigners". Sev and the two other Caucasian guys at our table had to get up on the stage one at a time. They had to put on headphones and listen to a Chinese pop song and then sing it back to the audience. The first audience member to guess the song won a prize. It was pretty funny and somehow I manage to escape without participating.

The other fun thing that I definitely think we should incorporate into weddings in the US came when it was time to toss the bouquet. Instead of throwing it, all the single gals came up on stage and took a red ribbon in their hand. The ribbons were all wrapped around the bouquet which was held by the bride. On the count of 3, everyone pulled on their ribbon but only one was actually tied to the bouquet. I thought this was a great way to keep everyone safe and avoid the inevitable desperate pushing and shoving that goes on the US!

Anyway, the last course was served around 11:30pm and by that time, we were ready to call it a night. All in all, a very fun evening and interesting evening.